Woe is me

It's a hard time right now, both financially and mentally. I'm beating myself up over the fact that I don't have a design job, and I'm still on hourly pay at my job now. I'm stuck, it seems, and with the worsening economy, it sadly seems like I'll be stuck for a while. I've got to call my student loan folks and delay the payments a little more... wahoo, just what I wanted.
I don't know what's going to happen or where I'm headed and that's a little too scary for me to think about without feeling truly nervous about the future.
I wanted to have started a family by now... I want kids at a young age, but this lack of stability ain't making it any easier, that's for sure. Turn around, economy, turn around... please and thanks.

Vegans are sensitive... at least I am

At my internship, I rotate seats frequently... I basically have no dedicated desk space.
Today I'm near the kitch and it smells of ground beef. Disgusting dead flesh...
Not a good smell for a vegan to have to intake.

Big town.

I'm posting from my little work station at my internship in Dallas. It feels weird to be here, as if I don't belong. It's only my 2nd day but I'm still attempting to "settle in". I've not yet made any allies, mostly because I'm too nervous to even speak. It's a sort of fear of looking like the stupid newbie hang-up I've got. I hope to get over this soon, as I'm sure I'm a little bit off to them, having not said much. All in time, I suppose.

Right now, I'm starving. I could really go for a Tofurky sandwich, but I don't have the supplies with me to make one. My mouth's watering just thinking about it. 

I've been reading Craig Thompson's blog a lot over the past few days. I've rediscovered his graphic novel Blankets, and wow, it's still as powerful as it was when I

 first stumbled across it in the 11th grade. It was fate, pretty much. That day in winter when my 

heart was broken and I needed to feel that someone else felt the same vulnerable, pathetic feelings I was feeling. I found that in Blankets. Anyway, reading his blog makes me want to sketch religiously yet again. I'll pick that up again, it's a good thing for me.

I've been shopping around ad agencies here lately, trying to find a few in Fort Worth, and boy howdy, there are quite a few nice ones. I'm excited to graduate and shop my portfolio around. I can't wait.

Speaking of my work, I need to get a domain set up for my portfolio site soon.

It's almost Halloween. WHOO!

That's about all for now. I hope to get my blog going again, but who knows when I'll have time for this again.

Garsh.

It's just about 2 am on May 6th. I can't sleep. My mom's having surgery bright and early in the morning, and myself and my family will be at the hospital while it happens. I'm nervous, hence the reason for my so called insomnia. I wish I could sleep. I've got allergies up to my ears, a runny nose, my eyes burn, I'm tired as can be, and I'm stressed out. Now would be a perfect time to rest.

I just hope all goes well.

YOU WANT A CUP OF COFFEE?

It's been nearly a month since I last posted something on this blog... and that's because it's been a very hectic time. I just started a new quarter in school about 4 weeks ago. I'm taking 15 hours right now, three of my five classes are portfolio-driven classes, meaning that the work we produce in them must be portfolio quality (or damn close). Oof. Hard times, and yes, I'm losing sleep galore. I've got to learn to function on 5 hours again. I did it all through high school, I can surely do it now. I reckon Lynne and I need to get that coffee pot going again on a daily basis. That ought to help out a bit.

I'm antsy to get out of school and start working... primarily so we can move into a little bigger of a space. This time the new place will preferably be a two bedroom so we can devote one room to being an office/work area for the both of us. We are each in creative driven fields and so when we want to do any work at home that isn't on the computer, "spreading out" is impossible.... we have too much stuff. We're both such pack rats. We don't throw anything out... Goodness. It's getting nuts! We're looking into a storage unit again, but this time we want one close by. The patio area is too cluttered now, and we just keep ending up with more stuff. 

I've got to get back to doing some school work. We were out late last night seeing the New York Dolls and visiting with our friends Jamey and Johnny. We didn't end up at home until around 2:15 AM and that meant we didn't get to sleep until around 3:00... and 8 AM came way too soon. School will kill me before I'm even out! Ridiculous, ain't it? All for a piece of paper and a higher paying job (hopefully). Take care now.